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Jokes – learning, teaching, the classroom etc.

Keep delivering in almost any jokes linked to learning, teaching, the classroom etc. – begin to see the form in the finish from the page

Submitted by James

Have you heard our teacher Miss Fischer was fired?
Yeah, she’d no class.

Johnny: Teacher, can you punish me for something I did not do?
Teacher: Absolutely not.
Johnny: Good, since i did not do my homework.

Teacher: Willy, name an important factor we’ve today that people did not have 10 years ago.
Mike: Me!

Substitute teacher: Are you currently gum?
Greg: No, I am Billy Anderson.

Teacher: What age were for your last birthday?
Bob: Seven.
Teacher: What age are you in your next birthday?
Bob: Nine.
Teacher: That’s impossible.
Bob: No, it is not, Teacher. I am eight today.

Teacher: Tommy, so why do you usually get so dirty?
Johnny: Well, I am a great deal closer down then you’re.

Joe: I do not think I deserve a zero about this test.
Teacher: To be sure, but it is the cheapest mark I can provide you with.

Mother: Why have you get this type of low mark with that test?
Joe: Due to absence.
Mother: You mean you had been absent at the time from the test?
Joe: No, however the kid who sits alongside me was.

Mother: Why on the planet have you swallow the cash I gave you?
Joe: You stated it had been my lunch money.

Teacher: Should you received $10 from 10 people, what can you receive?
Susan: A brand new bike.

Teacher: Should you have had a dollar and also you requested your father for an additional, the number of dollars can you have?
Joe: A dollar.
Teacher (sadly): You do not know your arithmetic.
Joe (sadly): You do not know my dad.

Teacher: Basically had seven oranges in a single hands and eight oranges within the other, what can I’ve?
Joe: Big hands!

Bill: Is not the main stupid!
Ginger root: Say, are you aware who I’m?
Bill: No.
Ginger root: I am the principal’s daughter.
Bill: And are you aware who I’m?
Ginger root: No.
Bill: Thank heavens!

Submitted by Elspeth Kempe, in Gauteng

Teacher: The reason for late?
Bongani: Due to the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Bongani: The one which states, School Ahead, Go Slow.

Teacher: BONGANI, the reason for doing all of your math sums on the ground?
Bongani: You explained to get it done without needing tables!

Teacher: BONGANI, how can you spell crocodile?
Bongani: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
Teacher: No, that’s wrong
Bongani: It can be wrong, however, you requested me the way i spell it!

Teacher: What’s the chemical formula for water?
Bongani: HIJKLMNO!!
Teacher: What exactly are you speaking about?
Bongani: Yesterday you stated it’s H to O!

Teacher: BONGANI, visit the map and discover The United States.
Bongani: Here you go!
Teacher: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
Class: BONGANI!

Teacher: How will you prevent illnesses brought on by biting insects?
Bongani: Don’t bite any.

Teacher: BONGANI, produce a sentence beginning with I.
Bongani: I is.
Teacher: No, BONGANI. Always say, I’m.
Bongani: Okay. I’m the ninth letter from the alphabet.

Teacher: Can anybody give a good example of COINCIDENCE?
Bongani: Mister, my Mom and dad marry on the day that, same time.

Teacher: BONGANI, your composition on My Dog is exactly like your brother’s. Have you copy his?
Bongani: No, teacher, it is the same dog!

Teacher: Exactly what do you call an individual who continues speaking when individuals aren’t interested?
Bongani: An instructor

Submitted by M. Cristina Manzanares

How can students learn better? Having a teacher or with no teacher?
Regardless of the teacher.

Submitted by Kate Webster

An OFSTED inspector, going to a primary school in Yorkshire, sitting lower in a table of the year 5 children who was simply manufactured due to their learning dfficulties. The inspector was eyed suspiciously through the group after which among the lads spoke.
Can thee do lengthy division?
Yes, stated the inspector.
Can thee do spelllings on t`board?
Yes, stated the inspector.
Can thee do became a member of up writing?
Yes, stated the inspector.
Then you`re on t`wrong table, mate! stated the lad.

Submitted by Eric in Warsaw. (an Englishman)

Here’s a different one from Belgium.
An individual who speaks three language is known as a tri-linguist
An individual who speaks two languages is known as a bi-linguist
An individual who speaks one language is known as. an Englishman

Submitted by Roswitha Krähenbühl

After an British test with particularly disastrous results, the teacher scolds the category after which she asks that everyone, who thinks that they’re not particularly proficient at British, should fully stand up. For a long time a lot of students just take a look at one another, but nobody moves. Finally, little Johnny gradually stacks up. Excellent, Johnny, states the teacher, a minimum of you understand in which you weakness is which provides you with an chance to enhance. Oh, however i don’t believe I am horrible at British, Madam states Johnny, however i simply felt sorry for you personally standing there alone.

Submitted by Andras (Andy) Chernel, Tomas Bata College in Zlín, (Czech Republic)

Along comes a fox and asks him, What’s happening tapping away on the laptop?

The hare replies, I´m writing my thesis on An Operating Method Of How Hares Gobble Up Foxes!

The fox laughs with scorn after a brief discussion, both enter in the cave. A short while later, the hare returns out, nonchalantly picking his teeth having a fox claw. He sits back lower and is constantly on the tap away.

Along comes a wolf and asks him, What’s happening tapping away on the laptop?

The hare replies, I´m writing my thesis on An Operating Method Of How Hares Gobble Up Foxes!

The fox laughs with scorn after a brief discussion, both enter in the cave. A short while later, the hare returns out, nonchalantly twirling a wolf-tail. He sits back lower and is constantly on the tap away.

Along comes a lion and asks him, What’s happening tapping away on the laptop?

The hare replies, I´m writing my thesis on An Operating Method Of How Hares Gobble Up Lions!

The lion laughs with scorn after a brief discussion, both enter in the cave. A short while later, the hare returns out, nonchalantly scratching his back having a lion paw. He sits back lower and is constantly on the tap away.

And what’s the purpose or moral to the tale. (Every scholastic tale ought to be educational and also have a twist within the tail!)

It´s neither important nor academic WHO we’re nor WHAT our thesis is about.

The important thing concern is WHO is guiding and counseling us (Our TUTOR)!

The cave was the place to find an excellent, irritated, hungry, publish-hibernatory bear!

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