The need to ask for advice arises periodically throughout life. Looking for a job, navigating the world of relationships, dealing with bullies, or figuring out what to do about your first crush are just a few of the life circumstances that may lead you to ask others for advice. Asking for advice in writing is different from a face-to-face conversation because it means that you need to think things through carefully in advance, provide all necessary information and ask appropriate questions.

Steps Edit

Method One of Three:
Composing the Letter Edit

Introduce yourself. If the person does not already know who you are, you will want to include a short paragraph introducing yourself at the beginning of the letter (after the salutation). Include information about who you are, and any information that is related to the reason why you are writing. [1]

• For example, if you are writing to an advice columnist to ask for parenting advice, you can say, “My name is Anna Smith and I am a 36 year old mother of two daughters.” In this case, you don’t need to say what you do for a living unless, for example, you were writing to ask about how to raise children well while also working full time.
• If you are writing to someone you don’t know, briefly let them know how you found them. For example, “I was referred to you by [insert name of person], who thinks you might be able to help me.”

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State why you are writing. After introducing yourself (if necessary), you will want to get straight to the point. You should begin by explaining the purpose of your letter.

There are lots of ways that you can open a letter politely. Examples include: [2]

• ”I am writing to ask if you could help me with…”
• ”I would appreciate if you could give me some advice about…”
• ”I am writing to ask for your advice.”
• ”I wonder if you could help me with a problem.”

Be specific with what advice you want. You should come up with 3 to 5 questions that you want answered, and write them out. Avoid writing a long list of complicated questions that would take hours of work to answer. Keeping it short and to the point will increase your chances of receiving a reply. [3]

Explain briefly why you are having trouble accomplishing the goal on your own. If you’re asking for advice for a problem or situation that you have been trying to solve on your own, but haven’t been able to. Then briefly explained what you have tried, and why it didn’t seem to work. [4]

• This can help the advice giver know that you’re not just being lazy, and that you really need their help. Additionally, it can save effort and time because they won’t bother suggesting a solution you’ve already tried.
• For example, if you would like advice about how to deal with bullying at school, you could say, “There is a big problem with bullies at my school. How can I deal with them when they are bothering me? How can I help stand up for someone who is being bullied? What can I do to make bullying happen less often?”

Keep it brief. The person you are asking for advice will be less likely to respond if you send them a very long and detailed letter.

This is because they will have to spend significant time reading and understanding your letter. If and when they write their response, they will probably have to write a longer, more detailed response in order to address everything you have written. Keeping it brief will increase your chance of getting a response, especially if you are writing to a well-known person. [5]

• A general rule of thumb is to keep your letter between 300 and 400 words. This length will give you enough words to introduce yourself and your questions without over doing it.

Include closing remarks. Before you end the later, you should include a “Thank you in advance.” You can also talk about a few different ways that you can be contacted to talk about your letter. It is important to show your appreciation in the closing remarks. Remember, this person does not have to help you, and if they take time to read your letter, you owe them a thank you. [6]

• For example, you could say, “Thank you for taking the time to read this letter. I understand that you are a busy person, and any advice you could offer me would be greatly appreciated. If it is helpful, I would also be happy to discuss my questions over the phone or over a coffee. My contact details can be found at the end of this letter.”

Make a list of people you think could help you. If you want advice about a specific topic, you should write down people you know have experience or knowledge with that topic. For example, if you want advice about how to deal with health issues, you might write to a nurse or doctor that you know.

• If you want to work as a nonfiction writer, you might write the names of accomplished writers, agents, or publishers that you could write to.
• You should include the names of people you know personally as well as people you don’t know as well, this could include past teachers, former bosses or colleagues, well-known people from the area in which you are seeking advice, or even advice columnists.
• Don’t forget family members. People, such as your grandparents, have had many experiences in life. This makes them well-qualified to give advice. If you’re having trouble thinking of someone, try going through your family members.
• Although you can certainly try writing to famous people, your chances of receiving a response are small. If you do get a response, it probably won’t be written by that person. For example, though might want advice from the President of the United States, any response you get will likely have been written by an intern or other public relations employee. Furthermore, these responses will usually be generic responses that aren’t able to address your needs specifically.

Identify what you hope to get out of asking for advice. Before you decide who to write to, you will need to decide what it is you really hope to get out of the letter. Do you truly just want their advice, or are you perhaps hoping to do a bit of networking and get yourself acquainted with people in a particular area?

• For example, an advice giver may be able to introduce you to others, connect you with specific resources or people, teach you how to do something, or they may just be able to provide a written response.
• Some people on your list may have more connections and ways of getting you started on something than others. If all you want is advice and nothing else, you can write to someone you know personally or to an advice column.

Research the background of potential advice givers. If you are writing to someone you already know well you don’t need to do this, but if it is someone you don’t know, find out about their background to make sure they would be able to help you.

• For example, if you are looking for relationship advice, see if the person you want to write to has had education or experience working with couples before.
• You can avoid wasting your time by doing this research. For example, although you might think writing to an advice columnist might be a good way to get advice, different columnists often specialize in certain topics. Some specialize in relationship advice, some focus on do it yourself advice, while others might focus on giving practical life advice.

Think about why the person should want to help you. Whereas a guidance counselor’s job is to provide advice, others to whom you write may not be accustomed to giving advice on a daily basis. Think about why this person should be willing to help you, and what you can do to make it worth their while. You might appeal to the advice giver’s sense of paying it forward or offer an exchange of services. [8]

• For example, if you know the person you could say, “I know it is not your job to answer requests for advice; however, I believe you are the best person to help me. I would be happy to offer you a home cooked meal in return for your time.”
• If you don’t know the person, you might offer to compensate them for their time, if you can afford to do so.

How to Write a Letter

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How to Make an Authorization Letter

How to Write a Formal Letter

How to Write a Business Letter

How to End a Letter

How to Write a Letter of Permission

How to Write a Friendly Letter

How to Write a Letter to Your Teacher

How to Write a Letter Asking for an Extension